empty nest

An ordinary life

~ 50themusical ~ Leave a comment

A good week to be me

There are those days or weeks when you feel at odds with the world and can fall out with everyone including yourself. Then there are those times where you feel that all is well between yourself and the world and have a sense of peace and calm.

This week has been a good one, where I have managed to get on with most people and have quite liked myself too. This might sound a bit odd, but there are some times when I overthink what I have said or done and feel bad about myself and end up not liking myself very much. However this week has not been like that. Friends or relatives may tell you differently, but I feel that it’s been a good week to be me.

There have been no great events this week, no particular defining moments, but sometimes life is like that and maybe its just appreciating the simple things in life that makes all the difference

A sense of achievement

I finished some work for my  Training Qualification this week, which has taken just short of a year. This has been completed as part of my job and it feels good to get it out of the way. Part of this was reflecting on training that I had done and assignments that I had completed. When you begin to reflect in one area of your life it kind of follows on that you do it in other areas of your life too, so I suppose I was in a reflective kind of mood. To really look at yourself, see what you did well, what was not so good and how you can improve is quite difficult sometimes. I certainly concentrate on what went badly and “beat myself up”, so it’s definitely good for me to look at the things that I do well, see the successes, rather than just concentrating on the failures.

It’s the little things

I was fortunate this week to spend a few days working in London. This was good for several reasons, not least because I spent time with one of the lovely ladies that I work with, but also because I got to see my eldest daughter a couple of times. One evening we went across to the university to watch the pantomime, which she had helped choreograph. Another evening we went out for cocktails.

Both were lovely evenings and very timely, as my daughter had been having a few rough days and was not quite as upbeat as she sometimes is. After a lovely chat, a hug and some reassurance, she was back to her normal self. No matter how grown up you are, you just sometimes need your mum. As an added bonus, as I came home her dad went to see her, so she got to spend time with him too.

Whilst my husband was away on Friday there was just me and my youngest daughter at home and we had pizza and a glass of wine whilst watching a film. It was lovely just to sit and chat and spend some time together. Sometimes life just seems to pass by so quickly and we forget that these little things can be really important.

If I should die before I wake

There have been some times in my life, not after great achievements or life changing events, but quite often after a family get together, a holiday, or just a period of time when things seem to be settled and all is well in my own little world. On these occasions I have said “If I die tonight, I would die happy”. My youngest daughter says I’m morbid. It’s not meant to be morbid, but just that feeling of knowing that as the day ends I am content with the hand that I have been dealt and couldn’t ask for more.

Wouldn’t it be great if we all felt like this at the end of everyday?

 

 

 

 

2017 – The year I am fifty

~ 50themusical ~ 4 Comments

Just like millions of other people at this time of year, as New Years Eve approached,  I started to think about what resolutions I should make for the New Year. And, just as I have done for many years I know that I will make them and break them within a matter of days, if not sooner. So why should this year be any different?

This year I will be 50!

It’s hard to believe. It seems like only yesterday that I was running around after my two young daughters, then suddenly I turned around and there they were, women in their own right, with their own dreams and aspirations, their lives stretching ahead of them. I must admit that I panicked at first. I love my husband to death, but I did wonder what would happen when we were on our own. I never had any doubts that we have a strong relationship, but could it pass the “empty nest” test? At the moment only one has left and is in third year at University and will probably not return. The other is in the last year of sixth form, making decisions about her future.

My husband and I have already started to enjoy the freedom that grown up children bring. Having holidays and weekends away without children was pretty new to us.  I’m positive that as I head towards 50 our lives will not be the same.  Not worse, not better, just different. He’s already 50, by the way and seems undaunted by the fact.

Reflections on years gone by

I think I am very blessed.  As I have said already I have a lovely husband (almost 26 years married) and two beautiful daughters (no bias there at all). I have had a stable job for almost 27 years and could officially retire in 3 years. I think I’ve been a sensible (some would say boring!) person, but have enjoyed life, not taken too many risks and always tried to do the right thing. Planning the things I was going to do when I retire kept me looking to the future and got me out of bed on a morning.

Things changed over the last year or so. Just after Christmas 2015, very suddenly, I lost a close friend who was a year younger than me. Another close friend was diagnosed with cancer shortly afterwards. I decided that “when I retire” was no longer the time to do things, but that I should do them now.

Here’s to the future

So as I head towards 50 I started to think about the things that I could do this year to make a difference to my life and possibly to others too. I wanted different resolutions. I still need to lose weight, get fit and all those other things that I promise myself every year, but I wanted this year to be special.

I was chatting to my brother who has recently published two books and I jokingly said “I think I’ll write a book”. He suggested I write a blog and promised me it would be easy.

So this it the first of my resolutions – To write a blog. No one may ever read it, but at least I’ll have a record of what I achieved. It also means I’ll have to make sure that my life is interesting enough to have something to write about.

I already have some holiday and travel plans (watch this space) and am planning a big party for my 50th Birthday, which is in April.

Why “50 the musical”

Well I love musical theatre! I always say that if I won the lottery I would spend the money just going to the theatre. I would see all those musicals that I haven’t had the time or money to see yet.

I like to think that setting my 50th year to music and dance would make it more exciting! I’m not sure who is going to play the part of me as yet, I’ll give it some thought.

Of course I’ll be seeing some musicals this year and no doubt telling you all about them in my blog.