family

An eventful week (2)

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So the second part of the week was spent celebrating our youngest daughters 18th birthday. It’s really hard to believe that she is eighteen already! When we used to go on holiday in a big family group she was always the baby and now she’s an adult too.

Celebration cocktails

On Thursday it was her actual birthday and we had a bit of a lazy day at home then celebrated by gong into Leeds for cocktails. There were a couple of friends and one of the mums who I am also friends with. We had a few cocktails together and then the young ladies went of to celebrate whilst me and my friend returned home. I’m definitely not cut out for partying until the early hours any more.

Party time!

On Friday evening we had the official party at our local country club, which sounds much grander than it actually is, but it was a great venue for her to be able to celebrate with her friends.

Early in the evening the family guests began to arrive and I was a little concerned when there were very few friends there. However I was reliably informed that no one goes out that early and true to form about 1 1/2 hours later the friends began to drift in and there was a steady stream of them for the rest of the evening.

They were a great bunch of young people. They probably drank too much, but there were no problems and they all seemed to enjoy themselves, which was the main thing.

The food consisted of take away pizza, mozzarella sticks, garlic bread and chips, followed by tiers of donuts. I was a bit dubious when she told me that this was what she wanted, but it actually worked really well and certainly as much easier than preparing loads of food that no one eats.

At the end of the night the younger ones went off to party some more and yes older folk went home to put our feet up.

It was great to see the young people enjoying themselves and was good to get the family together too. I may be biased but I’m really proud of how she has grown up and what a lovely articulate and sociable young woman she has turned into.

The only downside to this week is that I have  probably eaten my body weight in donuts and pizza and really need to get back on the healthy eating, but for this week, life was not about eating lettuce and fruit, but about spending time as a family and celebrating their achievements.

 

Everything Happens for a Reason

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So today the tickets arrived for my eldest daughter’s graduation. I am so excited. I can’t believe it’s finally here. I also can’t believe how quickly the last three years have gone by.

I remember going to all the auditions with her and her not being offered a place anywhere. I was heartbroken, but she handled it much better than me. She believed that something would come along that would be right for her and would come at the right time.

Her favourite saying has always been “Everything happens for a reason”. I have always told her that this is true, but she has been much more faithful to this than I have ever been. I try to think that things happen that are meant to and that in the future we will find out the reason why. Sometimes this is not so easy.

It’s hard to understand the reason why someone dies or falls ill, especially when they are very young. It’s hard to understand why there can be terrorist attacks or big disasters like the Grenfell Tower.

I have worked for many years with the most vulnerable people in our society who have been treated horrendously by those who should care for them the most. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve asked myself how people can be so cruel and if everything happens for a reason, what on earth could be the reason behind this type of behaviour.

I wish I could say that I was going to give you the answer, but I can’t. I only know that it has helped my daughter through some difficult situations over the years. She did get offered a place at university, not the one that she had originally thought of going to, but the one that when she’d visited she really liked instantly. There were others that were more popular or more high profile, but she knew what she was comfortable with and where she would fit in. She’s had a superb three years, met some great people, had some great experiences and come out with a first in her degree. Maybe that was the reason she got turned down for the others.

It’s certainly helped her over the last few months of auditions, where she accepts rejection as part of her development and chance to practice her skills.

When I discussed with people at work about whether “Everything happens for a reason”, some were very sceptical, saying that things just happen by chance and that there is no big master plan.

What do you think??

 

 

 

 

 

 

Getting Together

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Blimey my blog is late again. I’m not quite sure what’s happening. My weekends seem to be so packed that I don’t seem to get round to writing on a Sunday evening.

Community Spirit

This weekend was a really important one for the community of Batley, where I have lived all my life. It was also a really important weekend for communities all over the country.  This was the weekend of the Great Get Together, where people of all different backgrounds joined together to celebrate their diversity and to recognise the things that we have in common. I loved reading the updates about the various events that were taking place and the heart warming photographs of people from all walks of life coming together.

A friend of mine wrote a really good blog about this, which I would recommend if you want to know what it was all about

https://grimois.wordpress.com/2017/06/20/why-my-great-get-together-weekend-wont-be-soured-by-events-in-finsbury-park/

As part of the “More in Common” weekend, I attended an open air service at All Saints Church, Batley with my mum and my eldest daughter. I haven’t attended church much recently, as I have felt unsure where I fit in and just exactly how I feel about my faith. However the service on Sunday was relaxed and informal. The hymns were modern and upbeat and the sun was shining. It made me really think about the fact that  whether you had the same faith as others, or any faith at all, doesn’t really matter. What is important is that we treat others with respect, kindness and as we would like to be treated.

Family Gathering

As Sunday was Father’s Day, we had a family barbeque. The sun was still shining and it was great for us to get together and have chance just to sit and chat and have some food and drinks. My mother in law and father in law couldn’t come as my mother in law has just had an operation on her knee and had just come out of hospital.

After we had eaten for some reason the women were sat inside and we began chatting about faith, beliefs, learning about different cultures and tolerance. It was really interesting to hear other peoples views and to understand that although we may not always agree with others, sometimes it is good to air your views and let other people know how you feel.

Tomorrow my eldest daughter returns to London, to start looking for work and a new house, so I wish her luck with that. It’s been wonderful to have her home, but my bank account and my healthy eating have suffered whilst she’s been at home. I’m not sure which one of us is the bad influence.

 

Damage Limitation

After eating my body weight in cake and ice cream over the last couple of weeks, I dragged myself back to slimming world tonight and unsurprisingly I had put weight on. It’s now four weeks to my eldest daughter’s graduation and youngest daughter’s 18th Birthday party, so I have had to give myself a stern talking to and get myself back on track. I have made myself a healthy breakfast and lunch to take to work tomorrow. I realise how much money I’ve spent buying unhealthy food over the last few weeks, so not only will it be better for my health, but also for my bank balance.

I won’t dwell on it, its done now, so I’ll draw a line under it and start again tomorrow morning with a clean slate. I’ve also booked myself in with run together tomorrow to make sure I get my exercise back on track too.

 

 

Reflecting on the good things in life

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After all the sadness and unsettled feeling about the world in general, I am happy to say that I am feeling much more at peace with things this week.

A new life and new beginnings

I found out in the last couple of weeks that my lovely niece is pregnant with her first baby. She had had her first scan a couple of weeks ago and felt comfortable in sharing her good news with people. I am so happy for her and her partner and hope that everything goes well with the pregnancy.

It was also great earlier in the week when one of my lovely work colleagues brought his brand new baby son into work for everyone to see. He was a beautiful baby with lots of hair. Everyone was really pleased to see him and all the ladies wanted to have a little cuddle with him. It doesn’t seem to matter what is going on in the world, but a pregnancy or a  brand new baby always seems to bring such hope for the future. Who knows what these children will achieve in the future, or what the world may be like by the time they are adults, but for the present time they are safe and cared for by those who love them most.

A different new beginning

I was honoured to be invited to my friend’s retirement party yesterday. When I say retirement, he is only in his very early fifties, but has served with the Police for over 30 years. It was lovely to attend his celebration and to catch up with old friends and colleagues.

One of the really great things was that quite a number of the people that were there had not seen me for quite a while and were very complimentary about how I looked. I guess when you see yourself on a day to day basis, you don’t realise how much you have changed over several months. Losing a couple of stones and growing my hair a bit longer certainly surprised some people and have to say that I felt very pleased with myself. Hopefully this will now spur me on to keep up with the healthy eating and exercise.

 

All together again

Another reason to be grateful this week is that we have our eldest daughter home from university for a visit and it is nice to be together again as a whole family. She is only here for a visit and will be returning to live in London to look for work, but it is nice to have her home for even a short time. Our youngest daughter starts her new job this week and has her final exam at school next week, so I guess that it is a new beginning for both of them.

New Challenges

Whilst I was tidying out the spare room I found a notebook with a list of things that I had hoped to achieve this year. Looking through it I was pleased to say that I have completed some of them and am on the way to completing others. I now need to think about new challenges for this year and also for the years to come. My friend wants me to complete a 10k run with her, which will be a challenge as I’m only just managing the whole of Parkrun, which is 5k. In a couple of weeks I am taking part in a 6k run in memory of Jo Cox and will also be singing with Batley Community Choir at the run (obviously not at the same time, I can’t actually speak when I run never mind sing!). We are also singing at a concert on 1st July in aid of Jo’s charities.

Wish me luck!

 

 

 

 

 

As life goes on

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I promised myself at the start of the year that I would write a blog every week and that it should reflect on the things that I have achieved in the course of the year, making each week count , being positive and seeing a good side to things

As I started to write my blog this week, (which is late again for no apparent reason, other than I haven’t got round to doing it) there has been another terrorist attack in the UK, this time in London.

This blog has certainly been a challenge this week. I could find some lovely things to write about my week as I normally do: It was my husband’s birthday and we went out for a lovely meal and to the cinema; I visited my brother and his family and we spent a lovely weekend with them; My youngest daughter has had two interviews this week and has been offered a job and my eldest daughter has gone on holiday having finished her final year at university.

So there are a lot of good things going on in my life at this moment in time, for which I am most grateful, but it is hard not to feel sad and preoccupied with the awful things that are going on in the world and what will have to happen to change these things. Its hard to write a blog about my everyday life without it sounding trivial or unimportant.

Last week I did focus on some of the good things that came out of terrible tragedy and again this week there were amazing acts of bravery and selflessness. There were communities that stood together and refused to be divided by the acts of a small group of individuals. The concert held in Manchester to raise money and pay tribute to the people who had died or were injured was a great way of showing support and defiance.

But one mistake I did make was to read through lots of comments made on social media. I generally try to avoid reading people’s political rants and scathing comments about the emergency services or using what is going on as a platform to generate hatred, but for some reason on Saturday evening I found myself reading social media as the events unfolded in London. What had happened was shocking enough, but some people’s reactions to it were horrendous. I accept that everyone is entitled to an opinion, but I wonder whether some of these people have any heart, compassion or an ounce of intelligence to put on some of the things that they did. But then again, more fool me for wasting my energy in reading them.

So I close my blog this week with hope that there will not be another event like this in the near future, or even at any time and that those groups of people who are teaching tolerance and coming together win out over those who want to cause harm and distress to others, whether that be through their actions, lack of actions or words.

Here’s to a happy and peaceful week.

Where’s my Blog?

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As this was a Bank Holiday weekend, I did think that my blog might be a day late, but for some reason it’s actually two days late. It certainly feels like this will be one of those weeks when I am constantly on the wrong day. It certainly feels like it has been a long week. There was so much going on that it was sometimes hard to believe that it all happened in a week.

A sad day for Manchester

It was shocking to wake up on Tuesday and hear the news of the terrorist attack at the concert in Manchester. You could not help but be moved and feel great sadness for those involved. As the news unfolded during the day, there were some terribly sad scenes of people who had been injured and terrified when they should have been having a safe journey home after a great night out.

I think what was also extremely important to show, was all the good deeds that came from such a terrible incident. People who helped strangers, protected their own children and other people’s children, those who took drinks and staff for the emergency services and people who gave their time and skills for free.

Whatever is behind these terrible attacks, whether we apportion blame to the individuals, a particular group or whether we blame the government doesn’t really matter. It certainly doesn’t help those involved. However those good deeds, acts of random kindness, people doing the right thing, may help Manchester, the victims and other places, where terrible things have happened, to heal and move on.

The Play That Goes Wrong

On Friday night my husband and I went to the theatre to see “The Play That Goes Wrong”. I originally booked it as I was given theatre tokens as a gift, so I decided that I would book something that I wouldn’t normally go see. I am definitely a musical theatre fan and have only ever been to see a couple of plays. I have usually found them quite interesting, but I am definitely waiting for people to burst into a song and a dance at points.

However, this play was very different. It was so funny all the way through. there were no dull moments, or waiting for something to happen, it was full on from start to finish. It was very old fashioned physical comedy. There was no real swearing or smut involved, just the occasional double entendre. It was a really good night and my sides were aching when we left the theatre, from laughing so much.

A BBQ weekend

It was really nice over the weekend to be invited to a couple of barbeques. The fist was an invite from work and it was really nice to spend the afternoon in the sunshine, with a few of the people from work, having a laugh and chatting about things other than work.

On Sunday we went to my sister in laws for a barbeque. It was a lovely still afternoon and quite warm. We spent the afternoon chatting as a family and also being entertained by my niece’s five year old step son, who was a bundle of energy and kept us all on our toes.

Back on the plan

I started back on the healthy eating this week and felt much better for it. I’ve also carried on walking and doing a bit of running, so certainly feel back in the swing of things. On Saturday I went to park run, but did a different one to the one that I usually do. It was a really lovely run in Oakwell Country Park. We used to go there a lot when the girls were younger. The grounds there are beautiful and it makes me realise how many lovely places there are that are so close to home that we get out of the habit of visiting.

 

 

Oh What A Night!

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I love it when a plan comes together

So after six months of planning this weekend was my fiftieth birthday party. I knew exactly how I wanted it to go. When people had asked me what I wanted for my birthday, there wasn’t anything that I wanted more than to have all my friends and family together in one place. It’s not that I wanted to be the centre of attention, or to show off, just to see everyone enjoying themselves, laughing, dancing and singing and to create the type of memories that money cannot buy.

Viva Las Vegas

I chose a Las Vegas theme for my party. Some people that know me well were a little surprised at this as I’m not really the bright lights, loud, brash and over the top type of person. Years ago I was the type of person who would have said that I wasn’t particularly bothered about travelling to the USA, but then we took our girls to Florida and all that changed. I loved the customer service, the attention to detail and the way that everything is just so much “bigger and better” than anywhere else. After this I was hooked and shortly afterwards visited Las Vegas for our wedding anniversary and I absolutely loved it! We returned again for our 25th Anniversary and it was just as magical the second time around.

I thin the reason that I love it some much is that it is just so not me. I love the countryside, walking, evenings in with friends, but there is also a side of me that loves a party and just having those moments where you can let your hair down and just be a little bit wild and slightly bonkers.

Worth the work

So I had a venue, got a DJ booked, I’d ordered a casino, arranged the catering and two ofmy eldest daughters lovely friends were coming to sing for me. I made table decorations, bunting and ordered sweets to make a candy buffet. I had decided on my playlist, which I have talked about on my blog previously.

I made my own invitations and sent them out, after writing, rewriting and writing again my guest list. There were loads more people I wanted to invite, but was limited for numbers. I managed to narrow it down to 120 people. I wanted the people there who had played a big part in my life and who would know how much that night meant to me.

Friday was spent with my youngest daughter making mountains of cupcakes. On Saturday the hairdresser did my hair at 930am. I was convinced that it would be a mess by the evening, but fate smiled on me, there was no wind, rain or drizzle and by evening it still looked the same.

My eldest daughter and her friends arrived safely and on time on the train from London. My youngest daughters friend came and did my makeup for me and we were ready to go.

At the venue, just before people arrived, I suddenly had that moment of doubt that it would all go horribly wrong and I started to panic. Everyone was telling me to calm down and that it would be fine. Once people started to arrive I started to calm down and enjoy myself. And boy did I enjoy myself!

It couldn’t have been better

The evening started with my daughter’s friends singing some swing songs. They were amazing! I haven’t named them on her, but hopefully with their permission I will share some of the video footage on a future blog. When the boys got me up to dance with them I was way out of my comfort zone, but I embraced it, went with it and actually enjoyed being the centre of attention. As a surprise for me my husband and eldest daughter sang a duet – Me and my shadow, which was so good.

 

Afterwards we had superb food and the casino was open. People were up dancing and we had table magic. My lovely brother in law took loads of photos.

I danced all night and I have blisters on my feet to prove it!

I didn’t drink too much. early in the evening my youngest daughter was trying to get me to drink jaeger bombs, but I wanted to enjoy the evening and still remember it in the morning! However she made me promise that at 1130pm I would drink a jaeger bomb, which I did! I think this was my first one ever and I quite enjoyed it.

I was so happy to see everyone enjoying themselves and I have to say that it was everything that I wanted it to be and more!

Sometimes you can plan things and they don’t end up being what you expected, or don’t make you as happy as you think they will, but on this occasion I was overwhelmed with how wonderful it felt to have such superb family and friends, who all joined in with the partying and many of whom embraced the theme by coming in fancy dress.

I hope that everyone enjoyed it as much as I did!

The morning after!

This isn’t a tale of regret or hangovers!

Sunday morning dawned and was a beautiful sunny day. We had not gone to bed until about 230am, but I was wide awake at 630am, I think it was all the sugar!

I sat out in the garden, in the sunshine, with a cup of tea and waited for everyone else to wake up. We had six of my eldest daughter’s friends staying over and also my youngest daughter’s best friend. It was so great to have a house full of young people again.

I cooked breakfast for everyone and we sat out in the garden most of the day, eating sweets and cupcakes. I also broke one of the golden rules of our family and opened all my presents, even though my birthday isn’t until later this week.

Later in the day we went to see my daughter and her friends off at the station and then went to my brother in laws house to look through all the photos, which were superb and will save those brilliant memories for me.

I have to say it has been the best birthday weekend ever. I feel so lucky to have all these wonderful people around me and want to thank each and everyone one of you who made this such a happy and memorable birthday!

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’m just a mum!

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Proud mum moment

My youngest daughter took part in the school production of Billy Elliot at Woodkirk Academy this week and what a production it was! It had sell out shows every night.

The children and young people who took part were so talented and put their hearts and souls into the singing, dancing and acting. It was so good to see young people in a good light, compared to many of the things we see in the media everyday. From the performers on the stage, the orchestra and the back stage crew, the children were an absolute credit to their school.

Both of my daughters have been involved in productions at the school over time and I can honestly say that they have been some of the best performances that I have seen. I have to pay tribute to all the staff who are involved too as it would never happen without their hard work.

I couldn’t begin to pick out particular performers as they were all so good, but I have to say, even if I am a bit biased that my youngest daughter showed an aptitude for comedy timing that I didn’t know she possessed. Definitely a proud mum moment.

The performances, of all the children, in my opinion would rival any professional production. Considering that the oldest performer on the stage was eighteen years old, that’s pretty impressive.

Moving moments

Billy Elliot is one of those shows that has you laughing one minute and crying the next. It tells us a lot about family and community, but also about how it is sometimes really difficult to be different and that it’s okay to dream of a future that is out of the norm.

I absolutely love the show, One of the most moving moments for me is when Billy shows his dance teacher a letter that his mum wrote for him before she died. I can never listen to the song without being moved to tears. At the end the dance teacher tells Billy that his mother must have been a very special woman and he replies “No, she was just my mam”

Says it all really

A day for mothers

Today in the UK it was Mothering Sunday, or Mother’s day as it is more commonly referred to. It is a celebration of mothers, but also these days families as a whole.  I spent a lovely day with my husband, two daughters and extended family, at my sister-in-law’s house, where we all had lunch. It was lovely for us all to be together as we haven’t done that for a while. It was made even better by it being a glorious spring day. This allowed for sitting in the garden during the afternoon, chatting and relaxing. I couldn’t really ask for anything else to make it a perfect day.

It was so lovely to have both my girls home this weekend and to see them together, having grown into two very lovely young women (in my humble opinion). I am so proud of them both and feel very fortunate to have been given the privilege  of being a mother.

The eldest one has now gone back to London now, but will be back home in a couple of weeks for the big 50th birthday party. Can’t believe its so close now!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Making Progress

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Worth the work

My husband has finished decorating our eldest daughter’s bedroom this week. The decorating didn’t take long, once we had sorted everything out and packed it all away. We bought a lovely sofa bed and some very minimal furniture just to finish it off. I decided not to put all her bits and bobs back out, but just a few selected items, to make it look like her space. It looks so much tidier and much more grown up than it did before.  She’s due home on Saturday, just overnight so I’m hoping that she really likes it.

Three Dresses Later

After much searching, I’ve finally found the perfect dress. It’s the third one I’ve bought. The other two were okay, but just not quite what I was looking for. However I’ve got this one now and it is everything I wanted. I also found a lovely pair of shoes in my daughter’s wardrobe, which she bought for prom. They’ve been boxed up ever since, but go really well with the dress, so I’ve decided to borrow them.

The other dresses will come in handy anyway as I’ve got my youngest daughters eighteenth birthday and my eldest daughters graduation, both in the same week in July, so will need something to wear for these.

Still going strong

I’m still managing to stay off the coffee, even though we are a couple of weeks in to Lent now. It’s really helping me to stay off the biscuits and cakes too, which can only be a good thing. I’ve managed to do plenty of walking this week and a couple of runs, so that’s helping me to stay on the straight and narrow. I walked nine miles with my friend this morning. This is as part of the training sessions for Walk the Walk (moonwalk) which is getting closer. We’ll have to do some longer walks as the weeks go on, but we are really pleased with our progress so far.

 

 

Ups and Downs

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A personal Best

I went to Parkrun again on Saturday. I know I keep banging on about it, but I can’t tell you enough how much it’s encouraged me to keep on running. As well as being lapped by the fastest runners, I also get lapped by parents running with double buggies, adults running with small children and people running with dogs. Despite all this there is constant support from the marshals and a tail runner to make sure that no matter how slow you are, you always have someone with you. I hit another personal best this week, at 45:10, still at the back, but still determined.

A healthy eating lapse

My healthy eating plan went out of the window for several days this week. The first reason was due to comfort eating. I haven’t done this since the start of the year, but for some reason I allowed other people to undermine my confidence and make me feel miserable. Before I knew what had happened I had called in the supermarket on the way home and was tucking into a full tub of Ben and Jerry’s. This was then followed of two days of eating sweets and biscuits which made me feel rough. I know that comfort eating is not the answer, but still occasionally slip back into these habits without even thinking about it.

The second reason was that on Saturday I spent the afternoon in Leeds with some lovely friends from work, as one of our lovely ladies is leaving. It was a great afternoon and although it’s very sad that someone is moving on, it was lovely for us all to get together and spend some time away from work. It wasn’t great for the healthy eating plan (I’m not sure you can count cocktails as part of your 5 a day) but I thoroughly enjoyed it and I’m now back on track ready to face a new week in a positive frame of mind.

Decluttering

I spent my Sunday afternoon decluttering the attic bedroom. This was occupied full-time by my eldest daughter prior to going to university. She’s been gone for three years now and there are things stored in there that haven’t seen the light of day in all that time.

To be fair there were things that haven’t seen the light of day for a lot longer than that. This included the following:

  • A pair of ski salopettes belonging to my husband (we haven’t been skiing for over 20 years!)
  • My wedding dress (we’ve been married 26 years, but it did have an airing about 6 years ago when my eldest daughter went to a Tim Burton themed party as “The corpse Bride”)
  • Several pairs of shoes belonging to my youngest daughter (She absolutely had to have them, but wore them only once)
  • Various blow up air beds (some of which don’t actually inflate anymore)
  • Spare rolls of wallpaper and carpet (none of it which matched any of the wallpaper or carpet that we have now

Thankfully we agreed what would be taken to the tip, what we were keeping and what would go to the charity shop, which now leaves space for more useful items and after a coat of paint will make a lovely bedroom again for when she comes home, or a guest bedroom for anyone else who wants to stay.

A bit of a mixed bag all in all, but here’s to next week, whatever it brings!