What are we waiting for?

As I get nearer to 50 I have begun to realise that people expect certain behaviour from you as you get to “a certain age”, as demonstrated by the following conversation at work this week:

Male colleague: I need a haircut

Me: I’m trying to grow mine a bit

Male colleague: I think when women get to a certain age they shouldn’t have long hair

Me: Well what’s a certain age?

Male colleague: Well I know how old you are because you’ve invited me to your 50th

Me: So what’s classed as long hair

Slight pause, followed by an explanation of who he knows, how old they are and how long their hair is!

The thing is that I feel more confident, less stressed and more free to do some of the things that I’ve put off for years whilst waiting to lose weight, waiting until the children are more independent, waiting until I can afford or waiting until I retire.

Things to stop wasting your time with

My daughter posted an item on Facebook  20 Things You Should Stop Wasting Your Time Doing In Your 20s. I looked through it and I realised that a lot of the things that are still relevant to me and some of my friends of a similar age. It’s sad that we let our insecurities and self doubt restrict our lives.  I’m certainly still guilty of a lot of things on the list – namely

Feeling the need to justify your choices

Looking for reassurances that you are enough

Letting other people’s fear dictate your decisions

Talking about improving your life but never doing anything about it

Never leaving your comfort zone

Keeping your life cluttered

Deciding you’ll only do things when you have money or lose weight

Being afraid to ask for help

Sound familiar to any of you?

So part of this year’s plan of action is to start and shake these things off !

The girls

I was really lucky to be able to go to London with a couple of lovely ladies from work to see “The Girls”, this weekend which is the musical based on the Calendar Girls. It was a brilliant show, funny in some parts and very moving in others. It is written by Gary Barlow and Tim Firth. The script and the music seem to go hand in hand to create a retelling of the story in a new way. It is based on a true story involving a group of women from a Yorkshire Women’s Institute, who raise money for a sofa at a local hospital, where one of their husband’s died. They do this by creating a nude calendar. Very brave ladies who went against convention for a great cause.

The really great thing about it for me was the women in the show. Not only did they have great voices and superb acting skills, but their bravery in baring (nearly) all live in front of an audience was impressive in itself. The show talks a lot about women’s roles in life, what’s expected of women by their partners, children and society in general. It also teaches us a lot about ourselves. How we put on a brave face or try to be something we are not to fit in with others. One song especially struck a chord with me – “What age expects”- I’m not as old as the lady in question, but this line certainly says it all

“Don’t be the colour of your hair, be the colour of your heart”

Absolutely! And its no one else’s business how long that hair is !

Harrods – What a disappointment!

And finally just a little bit of a moan.

One of the things we wanted to do whilst in London was to visit Harrods. We had a few things that we wanted to buy. So off we went with our overnight cases, having checked ot of the hotel this morning.

Initially we were turned away from two exits and told to go round the building with no explanation from the slightly snooty security staff. I know I’d had a good night out but I didn’t think I looked rough enough to be refused entry.

On the third occasion we were directed to the next door on and were handed a bag drop card. We went to the bag drop and were told that our bags would be scanned and then we could leave our bags for £25 per item. The consolation was that you then receive a £25 voucher to spend in Harrods. Lovely, we thought, great for security and nice to wander round without the bags. Also fair enough that they charge you to leave your bag if you just wander round and don’t spend anything. Sadly this is not the case (excuse the pun) You have to spend £50 to get £25 off, so unless you spend £50 each, it costs you £25 each to leave your bag.

Come on Harrods, this is a really elitist system. If you’re concerned for security, I am more than happy to have my bag scanned and check it in.  I don’t mind paying for the privilege and getting some of the money back, but £25 is a joke.

My feeling is that it is not about security at all, but about making a bit of extra money, or just putting the average, non millionaire visitor off entering your store!

 

Moan over. After all it’s been a great weekend spent with lovely people doing things that I love most. Here’s to the next one ladies and here’s to all “women of a certain age” who refuse to be tied down by other people’s opinions of them. I certainly intend to be one of them.